Friday Fanfic

Buffy the Dragon Slayer

(An obvious continuation of last week's story.)

Chapter Nine-Gamma

"Run and catch," said Messalina in a singsong voice. "The lamb is caught in the blackberry patch."

"Excuse me, but do you really have to keep singing that song?" asked Buffy as she sipped her tea.

"I'm sorry, Buffy," said Messalina. "I just sing it because it reminds me of my dead mother."

"Your dead mothe -- Oh, I'm sorry," said Buffy. "Please go ahead. If you don't mind me saying, how did she die?"

"Well, as a matter of fact, I do mind you asking," said Messalina. "But I'll answer your question anyway. She died of natural causes."

"Natural causes?" asked Buffy.

"Yes," said Messalina. "One of my suitors disagreed with her so naturally she died."

"Wait!" said Buffy. "You mean she was killed?"

Messalina nodded.

"You poor thing," said Buffy. "You must miss her very much."

"Well, we all got to go sometime," said Messalina. "Don't you miss your mother?"

"Not really, but then she's still alive," said Buffy.

Then she realized how that sounded and said, "Sorry. I didn't mean to be flip. You see, my mother and I get along okay now but then I don't see her much anymore. When I first got my powers, we used to fight all the time. In fact, she once even called an exorcist on me."

"An exorcist?" said Messalina, perking up. "You mean she thought you were evil?"

"Well, for a while she did," said Buffy. "But then the Watchers Council discovered me and convinced her to let me go into service as a dragon slayer."

"My mother used to think I was evil too," said Messalina. "She never said so out loud but every so often I'd catch her looking at me in a certain way. You see, I'd have these visions..."

"You have visions?" asked Buffy. "Of the future?"

"Yes," said Messalina.

"Could you tell me my future?" asked Buffy.

"I'm not sure that would be wise," said Messalina.

"Please," said Buffy.

"Okay, you're going to go out and fight this dragon and end up becoming every bit as famous as Niccola Wood," said Messalina.

"I know you mentioned her earlier but I have to ask -- who's Niccola Wood?" said Buffy. "Apart from being this dragon slayer that you used to know."

"Niccola Wood is -- well, on second thought, you're obviously going to be more famous than Niccola Wood," said Messalina. "In fact, I foresee a bright future for you, Buffy."

"Really?" asked Buffy.

"Really," said Messalina. "If you don't believe me, just stare into my eyes."

"What am I supposed to see?" asked Buffy.

"Whatever you wish," said Messalina. "But in this case, glory. The glory you will achieve after you go out there after that dragon. By the way, do you know a person named Sister Jessica Calendar?"

"Why, yes," said Buffy. "That was the name of one of my former tutors. She used to be one of the few people in my life who was kind to me."

"Well, Sister Jessica says hi and looks forward to meeting you soon," said Messalina.

"Don't be silly," said Buffy. "Sister Jessica is dead. She died several years ago. You must be making a joke."

"Yes, that's what it is," said Messalina. "A joke. Now let's get you ready to fight that dragon."

To be continued...

Friday Fanfic

Buffy the Dragon Slayer

(An obvious continuation of last week's story.)

Chapter Nine-Beta

Buffy kept telling herself that she had nothing to worry about. After all, she wasn't the one who was going to fight the dragon. That honor belonged to Magdalena Walsh's mechanical creation Talos.

Indeed, it actually seemed good that Buffy was actually going to be able to watch a dragon fight as a spectator for a change -- and better yet, she got to keep her clothes on while doing so.

Then she got outside and saw the dragon. It was very easily the largest dragon she had ever seen. It was more the size of a small mountain than that of the overgrown lizards that she had usually fought as a Slayer. Heck, even Vermithrax Pejorative would have seemed like a newt compared to this creature.

Plus this creature stood on two legs. Buffy had fought many a dragon in her brief life and yet she had never encountered a dragon that stood on two legs. They were always on all fours.

To be fair, this dragon also had no wings but that did not seem to make a difference to Buffy when she saw how easily the creature breathed fire. Who cared whether or not the darn thing flew? It could very easily set on fire almost any flying animal that it saw.

Then the dragon turned in her direction. As a veteran dragon slayer, Buffy could guess what was coming but she still felt a bit of fear creep down her spine.

Fortunately, Talos was between her and the dragon. He converted his right arm into a sword blade and plunged said blade into one of the dragon's ankles. The dragon looked down as if wondering whether it was worth it to respond with a quick burst of flame. But in the end, the dragon decided not to.

Instead the dragon found it far easier to lift up one of its feet and then stomp the mechanical man to pieces.

To be continued...

Friday Fanfic

Buffy the Dragon Slayer

(An obvious continuation of last week's story.)

Chapter Nine-Alpha

Laurel took one look at the creature that used to be Buffy Summerfield and then turned toward Jamie Madigan, the lady who had transformed her friend into a dragon.

"Aren't we supposed to be reducing the number of dragons in this village?" Laurel asked. "I mean, we already have one dragon outside. Did we really need another? And what did you do with Buffy?"

"Buffy is the dragon, you silly," said Jamie.

Then Jamie turned toward the door of the back room they were in.

"It's okay to come in now, Sir Roderick," Jamie called out.

Sir Roderick hurriedly came into the room, only to pause when he saw the dragon.

"Good heavens!" he exclaimed. "How did a dragon get in here?"

Jamie laughed. "Don't you recognize her, Sir Roderick? That dragon is your dragon slayer, Buffy Summerfield. Now she no longer needs to fear death by fire. In fact, now she is the fire."

"Well, you said you were going to turn her into something fireproof," said Sir Roderick. "But I really didn't expect this. Now change her back."

"No time," said Jamie. "She has a dragon to fight, remember? I'll change her back after she's killed the dragon."

"Suppose something happens to you?" asked Sir Roderick.

"Nothing's going to happen to me," said Jamie. "Buffy here is my insurance that you and Laurel won't betray me at the first opportunity. After all, it would be a darn shame if the one person who could change your best dragon slayer back into a human were to, say, end up being drowned in a duck pond or burnt at the stake."

"She has a point," said Laurel.

"Laurel!" cried Buffy.

"Look!" cried Laurel. "The dragon -- er -- I mean, Buffy talks."

"Of course, I talk," said Buffy. "And what's this about a -- Oh my God! My arm. It's a dragon's arm. I've been eaten by a dragon!"

Jamie rolled her eyes. "No, Buffy. You've been turned into a dragon."

"What the fuck, Jamie?" exclaimed Buffy. "Why the hell did you turn me into a dragon? Why not turn me into a rat?"

"Don't tempt me," said Jamie.

To be continued...

Friday Fanfic

Buffy the Dragon Slayer

(An obvious continuation of last week's story.)

Chapter Eight-Gamma

"Wait a minute," whispered Laurel to Sir Roderick. "Didn't Niccola Wood -- "

"Not now, Laurel," whispered Sir Roderick.

"But Niccola Wood -- " whispered Laurel.

"I said not now, Laurel," whispered Sir Roderick.

"We can hear you, you know," said the man Messalina had called Stake.

"Oh, right," said Sir Roderick. "Of course you can."

Stake turned toward the innkeeper and his wife. "Excuse me, folks, but you mind taking Buffy and Messalina here to one of the back rooms for some tea while me and Sir Roderick have a private conversation?"

"Of course not, sir," said the innkeeper.

And just like that, the dining room was cleared of everyone save for Laurel, Sir Roderick and Stake.

"If your girlfriend does one thing to harm Buffy -- " Sir Roderick started to say, but Stake interrupted.

"Mess isn't going to harm Buffy," said Stake. "After all, she's not a cruel sort. At least not very much. Certainly not compared to the Countess Karnstein or that Hungarian aristocrat who likes to take baths a lot. Anyway, you don't have to worry about Messalina. She has no intention of harming Buffy."

"Then why did she deliberately mislead her about the fate of Niccola Wood?" asked Sir Roderick.

"Frankly, I would like to think that the more important question is how was she able to mislead Buffy about the fate of Niccola Wood," said Stake. "After all, Niccola Wood was a pretty famous dragon slayer in her day. And yet you and your friend Laurel were familiar with her fate -- and Buffy was not. How do you suppose that happened?"

"Well, I don't necessarily tell Buffy everything about past Slayers," said Sir Roderick. "She never asks and I never volunteer information unless it's absolutely necessary."

"In other words, your policy is don't ask, don't tell?" asked Stake with a sneer. "And you people think we have a dubious attitude toward humanity!"

"Nevertheless..." Sir Roderick started to say.

"Nevertheless, your girl is hysterical," said Stake. "The only way she's going to do her job is if somebody calms her down and right now Messalina is the best suited of any of us to do that. I'll admit that I would be a trifle wary of Messalina if I were in your place but you really can't afford to wax all that idealistic right now if you wish to save anyone from this dragon."

"And I suppose you and Messalina will be wanting immunity from the Watchers Council as well?" asked Sir Roderick.

Stake replied with a shrug. "It wouldn't hurt."

To be continued...

Friday Fanfic

Buffy the Dragon Slayer

(An obvious continuation of last week's story.)

Chapter Eight-Beta

Magdalena immediately left the room and came back in the company of a large man who appeared to be entirely made out of metal.

"Oh, I see," said Laurel. "It's a golem."

"No, it's not," said Magdalena. "It's a -- well, it doesn't matter what it is. It's the first of its kind and it kills dragons."

"How do you know that?"asked Sir Roderick.

"Because I've tested it," said Magdalena. "His name is Talos and I've used him to kill many a dragon during the past year."

"Wow!" said Laurel. "No wonder they seem to be scarcer this year than they used to be."

"So that's the thing that's going to go out there in my place?" asked Buffy, still bristling at Miss Walsh's crack about hysterical little blondes.

"Yes, it is," said Magdalena. "You have officially been replaced now, Buffy. I hope you have enough for an early retirement."

"Well, that all sounds very nice," said Sir Roderick, "but we have yet to see him actually fight a dragon. Yes, I'm quite sure you'd be willing to vouch for him but right now we need to see him in action."

"Do I get my immunity?" asked Magdalena.

"If this creation of yours works, yes," said Sir Roderick.

"Very well then," said Magdalena. "Let's take him outside."

To be continued...

Friday Fanfic

Buffy the Dragon Slayer

(An obvious continuation of last week's story)

Chapter Eight-Alpha

Jamie led the way to one of the inn's back rooms where she immediately advised Sir Roderick to step outside of the room while she got Buffy prepared for the big dragon fight.

"Why can't I stay?" asked Sir Roderick.

"Because Buffy is going to have to get undressed right now," said Jamie. "And she'd probably be more comfortable if she could do it in privacy."

"I've seen Buffy undressed before," said Sir Roderick.

"I'm sure you have," said Jamie. "And I'm also sure that she was quite uncomfortable with that. But it's okay. You have Laurel here to observe the preparation ceremony in your place."

"What preparation ceremony?" asked Buffy. "What are you preparing to do?"

"I'm going to turn you into something fireproof, Buffy," said Jamie. "That way you don't have to worry about being killed by the dragon."

"You're going to turn Buffy into a rock?" asked Laurel. "Because I'm pretty sure Buffy can't fight a dragon if she gets turned into a rock."

"She's obviously not going to turn Buffy into a rock, Laurel," said Sir Roderick. "I would like to hope that she too has a vested interest in the success of this mission."

"Thank you, Sir Roderick," said Jamie. "Now if you please..."

Sir Roderick left the room and closed the door, leaving a very nervous Buffy to undress before the gaze of Jamie and Laurel.

"So what am I going to turn into?" Buffy asked.

"I just told you," said Jamie. "Something that can't burn."

"A demon?" asked Laurel.

"No," said Jamie, rolling her eyes.

"A salamander?" asked Laurel.

"No," said Jamie, still rolling her eyes.

"A phoenix?" asked Laurel.

"No," said an increasingly exasperated Jamie. "What kind of heroine turns into a phoenix? I'm going to turn her into -- Oh, my!"

"What is it?" said Buffy as she dropped the last of her garments to the floor.

Jamie replied, "I've heard that you looked quite fetching in the nude, Buffy, but I never realized -- Er, you don't have to cover yourself for my sake. We're all girls here."

Buffy continued to hold one arm over her breasts and the other over her private parts, feeling a bit like a little girl caught stealing cookies from her mother's kitchen.

"No, thanks," Buffy replied. "Somehow I feel more comfortable like this."

"And yet you're supposed to be this big brave dragon slayer," said Jamie.

"Dragon slayers can be modest, too," said Buffy.

"Your nipples tell me a different story, Buffy," said Jamie.

"Well, what can I say?" asked Buffy. "It's obviously cold in here."

"Ahem!" said Laurel. "I know a naked Buffy is a hard sight to pass up but we do have a bit of a time crunch on our hands."

"Right," said Jamie. "Well, here goes!"

Jamie made a few gestures with her hands, muttered some words in Latin and then flung out her hands in Buffy's direction. There was a brief flash of light emanating from her hands and then --

Buffy disappeared.

In her place stood a dragon roughly about her size.

"There," said Jamie. "It worked."

To be continued...

Friday Fanfic

Buffy the Dragon Slayer

(An obvious continuation of last week's story.)

Chapter Seven-Gamma

"Who are you?" asked Laurel of the dark-haired woman in a black dress who sat at the back of the dining room. The woman was sitting next to a tall, white-haired gentleman who was wearing a black leather coat and she seemed to have an intense look upon her face that Laurel could not quite read.

"My name is Messalina," said the woman. "I could not help overhearing your dilemma and I would like to help."

"What can you do?" asked Sir Roderick.

"My boyfriend, Stake, here says that I have a gift for what you might call hypnotherapy," said Messalina. "I've used it to calm down many an angry suitor in my day and I might be able to use the same gift to help your dragon slayer. After all, at the end of the day, her problem is not that she cannot do her job. It is that she is afraid to try."

"Of course I'm afraid to try," said Buffy. "I'm going to die out there if I try."

"No, you won't," said Messalina. "I once knew a girl named Niccola Wood who had the same concerns about fighting a dragon in the rain that you do and things worked out just fine for her. In fact, you remind her a bit of her. Not that you two have that much in common physically but personality-wise... Yes, I would like to help you the same way I helped Niccola. If you'd let me."

"Are you saying that Niccola Wood was a dragon slayer just like me -- and that everything worked out okay for her?" asked Buffy.

Messalina replied, "That's one way to put it."

To be continued...