Novela de Mi Id

“In Fear and Trembling”

Chapter Four

At dawn, they awoke him for the ceremony. He was brought to the great stone baths where the sexless ones unceasingly scoured and scrubbed him until he was achingly clean. Then they dressed him in fine silken underdrawers and lavender trousers. A hairshirt -- so redundant in his case -- and a silken shirt of purest white were chosen to cover the bit above his waist. Around his waist they tied a black sash and upon his head they placed a gold crown. They also gave him a cape -- a simple one made of red silk.

Then they looked at him and they saw that it was good.

On the way to the chapel, he felt nervous. His head was pounding as if it resonated with the beat of a giant pendulum. His mouth felt dry and feverish and his palms sweated as if he was in the midst of a great desert.

When he reached the door of the chapel, he noticed his bride standing at the far end by the altar. She was clad in a white dress and a wreath of flowers was around her neck.

A sacrifice, he thought.

And he wondered what had made him think of that.

The sexless ones prodded him forward. Reluctantly, with the air of a vain yet cowardly actor, he walked forward, trying to keep his feet and face pointed straight forward. As he neared the altar, he looked away from the black-clad sexless one standing there and gazed more at his bride standing on the right.

He walked right up beside her and the sexless one gestured for him to stop. He did so.

A black-clad old man whom he had not seen before came forward out of the shadows and stood beside him. In his hand was a gold ring with a red stone embedded in it.

The old man gestured and from out of a darkened alcove, music played. An invisible choir sang words he could not recognize.

Then the old man gestured again.

And the sexless one spoke.

Once again he did not understand the words being spoken yet every so often, the old man prodded him and whispered in his ear the words he was to say.

Then at last, the sexless one asked him in normal language to join hands with his bride and he did so. Her hand felt hot and sweaty but she did not draw away. However, her eyes kept looking at the old man with an expression of fear.

He wanted to say something to reassure her but he knew not what to say.

Then the sexless one uttered some more incomprehensible words and gestured. The old man handed him the ring.

The sexless one said a few more words and then gestured for silence. No one spoke. Then it continued and at the end of its speech, it pantomimed placing a circle on its ring finger.

The old man prodded him again. He looked down at the ring and realized what the pantomime had meant. He placed it gently upon his bride's finger. He tried to reassure her with his eyes but she kept evading his gaze.

He thought he heard her whispering words to herself but the words she said made no sense. I am not here, she said. This is all unreal. I am far away, dreaming in my bed, and I am not here.

The sexless one spoke again and then stopped and clapped its hands. It smiled and pantomimed a kiss.

He bent forward to kiss his bride and felt only hot, sweaty skin.

It should have been better than this, he thought.

The sad look in his bride's eyes told him that she felt likewise.

Then the old man slapped him on the back. “Congratulations, my son,” he said.

The old man shook his hand and retired into the darkness. It was only the sight of the sexless ones bowing in the old man's direction that told him that the old man had been someone of importance. And it was only the sight of his bride that told him that he had not dreamed this.